In my second year of college, I was in a relationship, that was once again, going nowhere. I had still never found a love that could take the place of my first love. I was always trying to fill that void. I was meeting a lot of new friends in college and was wanting to find people outside of my inner circle to hang out with. Once again, out of nowhere I ran into Ryder’s Dad.  Savannah ended up being such a small town. Even though I had tried to change my circle, we still some how came face to face. It was never planned just fate, so another chance to go somewhere to talk and catch up.This was before face book so we had to see each other to know what was going on. One of my new friends, had an apartment that I would get away to study,  and I could go there anytime I needed to. When I ran into him that day, he followed me and we were able to be alone. We were so in love with each other, and no matter where we were in life, if by happen stance we saw each other, we would just have to be together. It was just understood, It was a magnetic pull that we could not control. We were so excited for the small window that we had to catch up and reassure each other of our love for one another. It was like living a dream for us both. It’s what we wanted more than anything. We carved out time for each other everyday for that week following our chance encounter. We went for walks at the college, we met at work, and of course we met at the apartment. We would just stand outside the apartment and hold each other, he would caress my face and just stare at me. During our walks,  we would just imagine this being our lives, holding hands, talking and dreaming that one day this would be more than just a fleeting moment.  These were the most burning memories in my soul, the ones we made during those times that kept us wanting more. We knew that we couldn’t keep going on like this, we would have to face the fact that this was not reality, or could it just be? Could we just go for it?  Could we give up life as we knew it, life just passing through with no real joy, for a romance that was buried deep, ready to come back to life. We would have to make a decision. I wrestled for the whole week with what to do. Here he was again, another chance to have the only person that would make me happy. The one that I longed for, but had to push down deep into my soul, now for reasons of responsibility and other people’s feelings not just our own.  I knew from our conversations that he was unhappy and wanted to get out. He never would tell me the details of what was going on at home, but I could tell he was ready to make a move. Of course, I was too. I was never happy with anyone that tried to take his place. The relationship that he would find me in was always tumultuous and there was no peace. The same for both of us. Late one night, toward the end of that week, my friend came over to my house and told me that Ryder’s Dad was at her apartment with all of his things packed. I jumped up and drove over. He had made a decision. What was I going to do? I loved him so much. I wanted nothing more for us to run into the sunset together and live happily ever after. He was distraught and obviously had been wrestling with decision as well. He wanted to do what he thought was best for his child, but deep inside he didn’t know if staying there was what was best. I was really struggling in college because it was so stressful, and I was living with a friend and had a very jealous boyfriend.  I knew that if a divorce was to happen, that it would be a struggle,  and we would have to deal with all the emotional and financial turmoil that would ensue. I knew in my heart, that he was who I needed to complete me, and he could finally be happy as well,  but  in reality, we had to make that hard decision once again. I was torn apart, how could this keep happening? How could he keep slipping through my fingers and ripping my heart into pieces. I would have to deal with this again and it hurt so bad. I had to tell him that I didn’t think I could handle the stress that would come if we made this move while I was finishing my last year of college. He was hurt. His hope had been shattered. His chance to make his life and mine the way it was meant to be was halted once more. He left that night, and I couldn’t help but think if it really was the right thing to do. What if we never met again? What if this chance never came again, and I let the love of my life walk away when we were so close. I chose my future career over my happiness and destiny. This was the end, or at least we thought.                                                                                          I went to college for three years and graduated with a degree in Dental Hygiene. During the three years of college,  I would think about these encounters that fate had thrown our way. The strangest thing was that it happened by accident every time. It happened a couple more times just the same way but I was still finishing school.  We knew what the ending would be and we didn’t want to hurt like that over and over. For some reason, we could not avoid coming face to face. It all runs together now but it would sometimes be for a couple of days or just a night. We would be elated with the euphoria of love lost found again, but somehow we knew that we would have to end it and return to reality. It was like living a romance novel that would never end like you wanted it to, but you couldn’t pass up the chance to live that novel, even if it was just for a short encounter. Each time we would cherish the moments that we had together and the chance to tell each other how we both still felt. We knew that we would never be able to get away from the feelings that we shared and the memories that we had. I believe that we never had closure because we never wanted our relationship to end. Through the years we were forced apart by our parents or just by life and responsibility and we couldn’t get past that. The last time that we met, my heart was so broken, that I finally turned to Jesus for answers and that was the end, at least we both thought.                                                                                    I found out later that after our last encounter, he never stopped keeping up with me.  He would find out what area or neighborhood I lived in through conversations with mutual friends. He would occasionally ride through the areas just to see if he could catch a glimpse of my life and to make sure I was happy. He never wanted to interfere with my life,  but he just wanted to make sure I was OK.  Once he drove through my neighborhood, and I moved a lot, but he finally saw me in my front yard. He was dressed in all black on a motorcycle. I was a bit intrigued because he just stopped and stared at me.  He finally drive off but came back around. He had on a  helmet and he lifted his face shield, but I still didn’t recognize him. We didn’t ever speak,but I recall the mysterious visit very vividly. He would also call me through the years just to hear my voice and hang up. Ryder’s Dad told me that he never lost me and in his heart, he always wanted to know if I was happy or not. Even if he couldn’t have me, he wanted me to be happy.